The Engleson Files

God, I don’t know where to begin with this one but I know I just have to get it out there. This is not really a guilty pleasure perse but more of a guilty as charged. Growing up I heard this song a lot and can always remember it being a very sad tune about boy-loses-girl type thing–in short I have always known this song. Anyways, one time in my later Grande Prairie Composite High School days I got dumped by one of my rare high school girlfriends and was feeling particularly fragile afterward. Emotionally drained, confused, bewildered, angered - you name it I was feeling it - so, feeling sorry for myself I decided to skip my last class of the day and went down to the mall to try and collect my shattered ego. I stopped in at a local music store and, as if in a trance, found my way to the bargin bin where I saw a “Best of Barry Manilow”compact disc. I took a quick look over my shoulder to see if anyone else was there, purchased the cd and quickly went back to my parents car and drove away to be alone with Barry. I parked the car at a nice spot on the highway out in the countryside, plugged in the cd and skipped to track #2, listened to this very song and cried like a baby. An hour or so later I came back to my senses, wiped away the tears and drove back home as though nothing happened. As you can imagine, I have kept this moment locked deep inside the guilty/shame file for a long time but found it got jarred last night when I heard Darren Brown singing this damn song. I can hide no longer, Barry Manilow’s Mandy - guilty as sin!!

While this isn’t really a guilty pleasure perse, it is a pleasure that I just indulged in today for the first time since being in China - and that is, of course, Campbell’s Tomato Soup. Yes, on a cold fall or winter’s day there is absolutely nothing like a hot bowl of cream of tomato soup with saltine crackers! For years now I have gone without but this year I was able to convince Kristin that we had the space and weight in our cargo to sneak over 6 cans of this delicious treat, and today I lapped it up until my heart was content. Delicious! Sometimes it is the little things that you miss about home and life just seems to have that much more meaning with Campbell’s tomato soup with me in China - now I just have to figure out how to conserve 5 more cans for the rest of the year.

I am a man - and a fairly manly one at that (I think…) - but yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have to confess that every now and then I enjoy a good old fashioned lavender bath. Now, I realize this goes against the very grain of my primal being and I have (already) felt the pangs of humiliation from my fellow male brethren who discriminate me on this cause; but I am here to say this one thing folks: on certain days there is nothing like a lavender bath! It’s calming, rejuvenating and helps ease all those worries away. These past couple of days while I have been sick the lavender bath has been clutch in helping me to get on that path to recovery. So I stand here before you now - proud - of the lavender bath and all its wonderful magical powers - a guilty pleasure no more!!

Yes, I must confess - when I first arrived back in Canada and had to go grocery shopping for the first time one of the first sections I went to was the Kraft Dinner isle. As a child I gobbled this stuff up like crazy and this fixation has embarrassingly continued on into my adult life. What can I say, I just love that powdery fake cheddar cheese dashed into a pot full of noodles! Now, I am not really one to boast, but when it comes to making the finest pot of KD around the “Engleson Secret” has no rivals; and I dare anyone to challenge my recipe! Oh yes, Kraft Dinner a guilty pleasure indeed.

Growing up in British Columbia in the 1970’s it was pretty tough to ignore the greatest hits from the rock band Chilliwack (especially living so close to Chilliwack and driving through it all the time). Anyways, everytime I listen to these guys I get a strong sense of nostalgia and it just seems that this particular song has struck even more of a chord with me. On a couple of occasions when no one else has been at home I have found myself cranking up this song and coming just shy of breaking out into the air guitar. Shameful I know, but when a guilty pleasure is trapped within sometimes you just have to let it out in a fury - as long as no one else is around!
Busted!!

Today I need to confront my inner demons and confess to something that I have kept a secret for a little over a week now: I have quite enjoyed watching the television program Project Runway. To be honest, I have never even heard of this show until that fateful day when Susan Colorado handed over the first 3 seasons to Kristin on DVD - and now we have been averaging two episodes a night! I am not too sure what it is about it, but there is no question watching very effeminate males engage themselves in high stakes fashion drama has some serious entertainment value. Damn fashion world!

This is another one of those nostalgic-gone-wrong type guilty pleasures. It has been years since I have thought about this song and album, but there is no question to a young child growing up in the 70’s Boney M’s Night Flight to Venus was hard to ignore. Maybe it was the cylons from Battlestar Galactica in this song that triggered me but there is no question I was hooked. I can remember very vividly listening to this song over and over and just staring at the album cover. Either way, I cannot escape it, I am a happy passenger on the Starship Boney M - damnit!

Well, just the other day I was busted by Darren Brown about a long, dark guilty pleasure of mine. Yes, Frank Mills. I’m not sure if it is staunch patriot in me, or a hidden desire to be a pianist, but, during my grade 10 year I became a huge/secret fan of Frank Mills - especially his tune Peter Piper. In fact, in my grade 12 year Frank Mills came to Grande Prairie for a concert and I was one of the first to buy some tickets - even got a date to go with me! I cannot hide this secret any longer, the simple fact remains, I’m a Frank Mills fan. Kick it Franky!

Sorry it’s not Frank, but this is the tune that started it all. Give me a C, a bouncy C

Yes, I must confess that while I was in grade six (the first time around) I tried my hardest to learn how to moonwalk like Michael Jackson. He was all the rage back then and I thought it was a pretty neat thing to do. To this day my primitive, white, rural-Canadian brain still cannot comprehend how it is done. But, deep down inside, I always wished I could have done it (I know Tanya Pelly would have gone out with me if I could have!) and as I sit here before you now, I still wish I can. Guilty as charged!

Oh yes, this is definitely a guilty pleasure of mine! I love cereal to begin with, but I am a total sucker for the sugar based kiddie cereals, and Cap’n Crunch easily tops that list. Yes, I admit that I do feel a slight twinge of embarrassment when I am standing at the counter ready to purchase this, but I do not let that stop me; and now, thankfully, I have a child who I can pretend I am buying it for (thus allowing my guilty pleasure to remain a secret!) I cannot wait to go home this summer and have my fill. Cap’n Crunch, ladies and gentlemen, one of the all time classics!

Mexican Whistler

Yes, this is a guilty pleasure gone wrong, real wrong. During my younger “experimental twenty-something” days, my friends and I would find music that we remembered from our family’s past and then listen to it in order to a) reminisce about the good old times when we were children, and b) make fun of our parents music styles; many wonderful nights were spent doing this activity. But, something happened along the way as I began to reconnect with one of my parents favorites: Roger Whittaker - I actually began to enjoy his music! Now, I still think it is nostalgia that carries me through this touchy situation, but really, how can anyone not whistle along and tap your feet when ol’ Rog does his thang? Exactly, you can’t!!

I was 14 years old, I was confused, I bought this album - enough said.

In my everyday life I like to think I am a fairly non-violent type personality; I don’t wish to fight anyone, I don’t ever feel the need to purposely go out and hurt someone and I don’t agree with war. But, when it comes to hockey, man, do I love a good fight! I don’t know what it is, but to see a hockey fight break out when a team needs it is a thing of beauty. Now, I don’t agree with fighting for the sake of fighting, only when, or if, it can play a key role in the outcome of the game - the fights must always remain within the game of hockey, not be a by-product of it. Guilty pleasure? Hesitantly, I guess so, but, I can’t wait to see another one!

Yes, this is without question another guilty pleasure of mine - Little House on the Prairie. I have enjoyed this show (especially the early seasons) for quite some time now, and yes, have even shed a tear once or twice through a couple of episodes - that damn Half-Pint! The show had it all, and really, if I could be half the father Charles Ingles was, I would consider myself a happy man. So yes, I come forth again, to Little House, a guilty pleasure indeed.